To All the Songs I’ve Loved Before

 

Some songs have had all the life squeezed out of them. Let’s face it. Songs that are so familiar they’re just white noise. It doesn’t mean the artist isn’t talented, or the song wasn’t once great, but I find myself barking at the radio from time to time, saying, “Enough already!”

scenesFor example…let’s start with one of my favorite artists ever. Billy Joel. Scenes from an Italian Restaurant is a song I’ll listen to every chance I get. Uptown Girl? STOP IT. No. Enough. Why play that crappy little song when you could play, I don’t know, 649 other Billy Joel songs that are far superior? Until the Night. New York State of Mind. Miami 2017. Rosalita’s Eyes.

I’m pretty much done with the Beatles forevermore. Oh, I loved them! Don’t throw trash at me! But enough already. I Wanna Hold Your Hand? No. I do not. I reject you, Paul, John, George and Ringo. In My Life is still beautiful to me, but even songs like Hey, Jude, which I once loved and can still sing word for word, just don’t hit me in the heart anymore.

Born in the USA. Okay, first of all, anyone who thinks this is a patriotic song about how great it is to be American needs a hearing check. It’s about the lack of opportunities in the blue-collar towns of the US. It’s about how we shouldn’t have gone to war in Vietnam. Besides, Bruce Springsteen has so many better songs! Born to Run. Thunder Road. The Rising. Philadelphia. Much more poetic and heartfelt. Also, Born in the USA doesn’t have a great beat, and I can’t dance to it.

bowieLet’s Dance by David Bowie. Again, one of my all time favorite artists. The only celebrity whose death made me cry like I’d lost a favorite uncle. Play Heroes forevermore. Young Americans. Putting Out Fire. Star Man. Anything but Let’s Dance.

Stairway to Heaven. If I never hear this song again, it will be too soon.

Sweet Home Alabama. Ditto.

That one about pina coladas. HOW did that get so much play? How? Why?

champagneHotel California. Yeah. Put the pink champagne back in the fridge. I’m good.

Someone Like You. Adele, if I have to hear you caterwauling about your stupid high school boyfriend one more time, I’m going to scream. I have screamed. That being said, you can sing Make You Feel My Love to me until my death, and it won’t be enough.

Phew! That felt good! Thanks for listening.

 

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